Faithful Servant

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Light; Bright light; so bright it blinded me.

I closed my eyes for a moment, until I could finally see.

When adjusted, I stood in shock. My mouth just hung ajar.

This place, its very essence, gleamed like a brilliant star.

It was huge, and looked so powerful. It just screamed of strength and might.

Not a shadow touched a hidden place; Just pure unhindered light.

My bare feet scraped the golden glass, the ground looked almost clear.

I couldn’t say how long I stood there; a day, a month, a year?

A gentle nudge retracted me from my frozen state of awe.

I shifted gaze and mere words fail to describe all I saw.

A gate so tall I craned my neck; its bars were strong and thick.

It gleamed of gold to suit the place, but I had never questioned it.

It guarded something on the other side, but I really couldn’t see.

The man who stood to my front was, well, much taller than me.

I stood in line with many others, to count I dared not try.

There were men and women; some young, some old, but not a single eye was dry.

Much attention was set on a solemn place, something off to my left.

When I turned, a sob tore through me and I couldn’t catch my breath.

A massive chasm threatened me. It was wide and long and deep.

No railing stood around its edge; its sides, far more than steep.

I couldn’t tear my eyes away, and I shook without control.

The smell of burning flesh met me and it made my stomach roll.

With a book in hand, an angel stood at the base of that giant gate.

As a person neared they trembled – to learn their eternal fate.

If that book contained the person’s name, written in precious blood,

Then through they’d go, to the other side, tears falling like a flood.

But if that book held no account of that person ransomed back,

Then that chasm proved a horrid place as they begged for what they lacked.

My heart bled with their pleas, they relayed all they’d done:

They’d gone to church, they’d paid their tithes, never murdered anyone.

Some had performed a healing, some had led an altar call,

But not a word made a difference, each one had to fall.

It wasn’t just the “bad people” that were dealt this gruesome hand.

All my life I’d pondered this, but I could finally understand.

Only through the blood of Jesus could you escape this awful lot;

Not through works, not through effort, nor any man-made plot.

My thoughts were interrupted by a very familiar voice.

I heard the angel say “This was all your choice.”

The voice was from my neighbor lady; so perfect, pretty and fit.

Sure. We were friends on Facebook, but goodness! That was it!

We worked so hard to avoid each other that we never spoke at all.

Now here we were, both in line, waiting for our judgment call.

She stood, trembling, at the very front; the angel shook his head.

She fell down on her face and begged “One more chance” instead.

With heart ripped out, I watched with guilt as she was thrown down in the dark.

Maybe if I would’ve shared Jesus, then she would’ve hit the mark?

The line moved up and I rubbed my eyes, that looked just like my aunt!

She had always been a Christian woman. She won’t go down. She can’t.

But the angel shook his head, and again I stood in shock.

She tried to run. She pulled the gate, but those golden bars were locked.

She was thrown down in and my heart tore, and I this time I felt faint.

She was gone forever, to eternal pain. I’d always thought she was a saint.

One by one the line moved up. Like molasses, it was slow.

A seldom few had made the mark, but countless were told “No.”

I knew their faces, I’d touched their lives, I’d had the chance to share.

But oftentimes, more so than not, I hadn’t even cared.

My mind relived every microsecond, where I let darkness win.

I remembered every little moment that I caved in to sin.

Every time that I had lived for self, every evil thought I’d entertained,

Each blessing that I had given up, each joy traded in for pain.

Looking back, those little things, meant way more than I’d thought.

Now I was out of time and my secret sins were caught.

As my turn grew closer, and I watched with pain, I conceived the very worst.

I hadn’t lived like I should and thus by it I was cursed.

Nearer and nearer my turn came and more and more fell.

Had my name been called? Had someone spoken? I couldn’t even tell.

I dropped to my knees, then flat on the ground; hands covering my face.

I had no right to claim any portion of this grace.

I deserved that deep pit, that separation, my whole life wreaked of shame.

I was drowning in my own guilt when I heard them say my name.

I couldn’t move. My strength was gone. I was just too weak.

“My Child” a voice said, and I couldn’t even speak.

My mouth went dry and my throat constricted as I looked up at Him.

His eyes were soft, His touch was sweet, His face not sad nor grim.

He picked me up and carried me. My tears ran down unchecked.

He set me down most gently, but He wasn’t finished yet.

He stroked my cheek and I could feel the scars that still marred His hand,

He bore them all, every wicked mark, in this perfect, sinless land.

“My child,” He said. “Why do you cry? Why are you troubled so?”

“Because, my Lord, I have seen my sin. It’s so great. I really know.

My hope of heaven was met on earth. That’s all that I have earned;

That pit, eternal suffering, if only I had learned.”

I couldn’t speak, the sobs too strong.  I could only hang my head.

He spoke, I didn’t hear him and asked “What was that You said?”

“Precious child, My child, My blood has purchased you.

Your sin was forgiven when I died on that cross, but all of that you knew.

You’ve seen your sin for what it really is. You finally know its weight.

You’ve seen yourself as God saw you, in that wretched, blackened state.

But when you believed on Me, and really changed, He saw your filth no more.

When He looked at you, He saw Me instead, your admittance then was sure.

As you walked, as you journeyed forth, you certainly did fall down.

You chose to sin, you denied My name, My smile turned to frown.

You hurt My heart, you turned from Me, you worshipped other things.

You turned your eyes from hurting souls, and your pride could rival kings.

But My love for you has never died, and when you came running back,

I picked you up and cleaned you off and placed you back on track.

You had ups and downs, good times and bad; and while, Yes, you did things wrong.

Your heart was soft, you tried so hard, and you grew. You’ve come along.

So no more tears. No more crying. Wipe them all away.

For through that gate, I’ve made your home. You’ll join Me there today.”

He held me tight, and I felt such peace. He said “You deserve it.”

Once through those gates, He looked at me, “Well done my faithful servant.”

Elecia Hoffman 1/13/15

Come

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Sometimes life just seems to hit you like crazy storm, doesn't it? Like, all of a sudden you're being slammed by pounding hail and torrential downpour. You can do nothing but stand there, in the very center of it, and feel the full force of the torrent. Those moments are hard, I know. But sometimes, in the very middle of the rage of that storm, something really beautiful happens.

Don't Waste The Coast

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"Now don't waste the coast on the way down. Keep peddling, even on the downhill. It'll make going uphill that much easier."

My dad's words echoed through my mind as I began to descend the small country back road hill on my two-wheeled bicycle. It felt unnecessary to continue moving my peddles as I coasted down the big hill, but I kept on it anyway. "Don't waste the coast." "Don't waste the coast." "Don't waste the coast."

It Ain't...

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It ain't about your picnics, 

Not your bash-out barbecues. 

It ain't about your Stars and Stripes, 

Or your red and white and blues. 

It ain't about your big parades, 

It ain't even 'bout the flag. 

No, Memorial Day ain't a day

Of which anyone can brag. 

Yes Memorial Day is a holiday,

But that does not suffice. 

It's a time to honor all the lives

That paid the highest price. 

To remember all the heartbeats

That stopped right in their prime. 

To honor all the fallen,

That stood for us over time. 

To remember every patriot. 

The first ones to take up arms. 

For every soldier that ever stood,

Between us and harm. 

When they fell on the battlefield,

When their life-blood stained the ground. 

They proved duds didn't matter-

Blue, grey, green, or brown. 

Through all the wars we've been in,

Through every battle fought,

They proved freedom isn't free

And it's never fully bought. 

Each bead of sweat sustained it. 

Each drop of blood ensured. 

And with every life laid down,

Your freedom is secured. 

Honor those that fell for you, thank a veteran. 

The Climb

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Falling. She was falling.

She could feel her body plummeting helplessly as her weight pulled her mercilessly toward whatever surface may rest below her. If, indeed, there was any surface down there at all. Perhaps her fate would be sealed in an eternal plunge downward.

Oh how she hoped not! Her arms flailed about her as she grasped for something, anything, with which to catch herself. Her fingers groped through the worthless air searching for a hold. Her feet kicked at nothing hoping to meet some surface to support themselves on.

With each flail about, each grasp at emptiness, her heart sank with desperation. Her mind relived the critical seconds before her fall- the very seconds that sent her spiraling downward. She recalled the treacherous climb thus far; a sheer mountain cliff with walls so steep they almost appeared to be going completely vertical.

Her climb began with what seemed like an eternity ago, when her Father lifted her up and placed her on that mountain cliff. He stood behind her and made sure that she had good places for her hands and feet to grip. With His arms outstretched, He watched as she ever-so-slowly began to move one hand, letting go of that first grip and reaching for another. Once the first hand was secured again, she lifted her opposite foot and found a new rest for it. Eventually all of her limbs had moved from their original holds and were now secured in new ones. With a triumphant smile, she turned her head around and beamed at her Father. "Look Daddy! Look how far I've gone already!"

Her Father smiled back, His arms never leaving their outstretched position, "Yes, Baby! You're doing so well! Daddy is right here if you need Me. I won't leave you to do this alone."

She had loved climbing in that moment. In those times when her Father was close, it had felt like nothing could ever happen to her. She felt safe and encouraged.

Lately, however, her Father had felt distant. She couldn't see Him. She could barely make out His voice. He had encouraged her to keep climbing, to go farther and farther away from the comfort of her direct view of Him. Eventually, she could no longer even make out His form. It was in that moment that she began to feel very anxious about the whole thing. She had tried to recall the words her Father had told her. She had attempted to recollect even just pieces of His wisdom and advice. Nothing came.

Instead her heart began to match the looming darkness of the above skyline. She had watched with fear as the bright summer sun had been overshadowed by the dark clouds of an impending storm. She clung helplessly to the side of that cliff as the rain pelted her back and the wind questioned her grip. It was almost as if that storm had been mocking her- laughing at her for each flaw in her posture, grip, and purpose. Was she doing the right thing? Why had she come this far? Wouldn't it have been safer to stay closer to the ground? What did her Father actually say?

These questions began to grow louder and louder in her head. The rain was stinging her shoulders and slamming into her temples. The wind had picked up severely and she could feel her grip pulling loose. Sweat beads had begun to form on her forehead despite the chill in the air. She couldn't let go now! She was way too far up for all of that!

However with every howl of that wind, every slamming drop of rain, every mocking question that flashed through her mind, her resolve weakened and her doubt grew. She felt utterly helpless and completely alone. She strained her ears to hear her Father's voice above the overpowering noise of the storm. Nothing. Did He not care that she was enduing this storm alone? Did He leave and forget she was up here? Why would her loving Father put her through this?

"He left you alone. You can't do this."

That was it. With that one gust of mocking wind she lost her secure footing. Her grip loosened and she went flying backward. She began falling, flailing, groping, and grasping at nothing with that statement rolling through her mind.

...And here she was. Waiting, wondering when, if ever, this falling would cease and she would meet her demise against the hard ground she began on. Almost as if physics could read her thoughts, her body suddenly slammed to a halt. All the adrenaline from falling immediately vanished, taking with it her ability to breathe. Her chest quickly raised and lowered searching for air to fill her lungs again. She audibly inhaled deeply once her breath returned and she fell back against the surface below her to recover from the ordeal. As she lay there, she assessed her physical person. Nothing felt broken. In the dimness of the available lighting she eyed her body up and down. No blood. No large gashes. She could feel the formation of some nasty bruises, and knew for a fact that quite a few abrasions were present, but she could move and she was alive. She would feel this later, for sure though!

She slowly sat herself upright and rested her forearms on her knees. The storm was still raging around her. She was soaked to the bone, battered, beaten, and completely alone.

"He left you alone. You can't do this."

Those few words swirled around and around in her mind. Tears mixed with raindrops and ran down her cheeks unchecked.

She lifted her face to the sky and screamed "How could You?! How could You just let me fall like that? You were supposed to be here for me! You weren't supposed to leave me! How could You?!"

Sobs overtook her weakened form as the storm raged on around her. "You put me on this mountain! You encouraged me to climb! Then you just leave me?!"

She fell forward, flat on her face, and lay there for no other reason than pure weakness. She replayed the audio of that mocking voice in her head over and over. "He left You alone. You can't do this. He left you alone. You can't do this. He left you alone. You can't do this."

"Daddy is right here if you need Me. I won't leave you to do this alone." The words of her Father suddenly rose to her thoughts. She slowly lifted her head only to slam it right back down. The darkness that had come with the storm was gone and the sunlight was too bright for her ill-adjusted eyes.

"Daddy?" Her voice cracked in her throat. Again lifting her head, she called "Daddy? Daddy are You there?"

Then she saw Him. He was sitting right beside where she had flopped herself. His eyes looked down on her and He smiled. He reached out His hand and gently brushed the hair out of her eyes. Then His capable arms slowly lifted her upright until she sat tall beside Him.

Her eyes grew large at seeing Him once more and she threw her arms around Him. "Oh Daddy! You came back!"

His face was serious as He said to her "Baby, I never left you. I've been with you the entire time."

She pulled back from her embrace "But...but the storm! It was so terrible! I listened and listened, but I couldn't hear You! Then I fell! I fell from way up there!" She pointed.

He pulled her closer. "I was here. You couldn't hear My words because you allowed to storm to talk over me. You allowed your fears and doubts to drown out My voice"

Realization dawned on her. Not once had she ever called out to Him. Never did she truly listen for is voice or take the time to recall His instructions. She was too caught up in her storm. Tears began to fall down her cheeks once more. "Oh Daddy! I'm so sorry! I'm sorry I doubted You. Sorry I listened to other voices and not Yours."

His eyes were smiling once more. "I forgave you a long time ago."

She laid her head on His lap and allowed Him to comfort her. Her body ached with the aftermath of that fall. She was still soaked with rain and covered in mud, but she was safe in the arms of her Father.

"He left you alone. You can't do it." At the recollection of that voice her head shot up.

"They were right about one thing. I can't do it. Not without You." She told her Father.

He stood pulling her up with Him and spoke, His voice clear and gentle. "I am always here for you. I won't ever leave you to do this alone. Remember that, even when you can't hear me."

He pulled her once more into the comfort of His arms. "Now let's keep climbing."